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Hall of Shame

This is the cold email hall of shame for the worst prospecting emails.

Why I Hate People Who Lie About Dreamforce

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dreamforce sales liar

I love cold email, but I can’t stand lazy liars.

I’ll admit that I’ve been a champion of using “social engineering” in sales prospecting. That’s where you architect a situation that might not otherwise naturally occur in order to strike up a conversation and quickly build rapport. In fact, I’ve regularly referred to upcoming or past conferences and tradeshows as a point of conversation in my own cold emails, but that’s not the same as blatantly lying to your sales prospects.

If you attended Dreamforce and you’re in sales (or even if you didn’t attend!), there’s a good chance that you’re probably getting bombarded with lame sales prospecting emails right now too.

The following sales prospecting email especially irritated me because it wasn’t very thoughtful and I know it absolutely wasn’t true.

leadspace lies about dreamforce

Why this cold email sucks:

Although I spoke at Dreamforce, I actually didn’t go to any booths. I dislike conferences and crowds, and so I avoid them whenever I can. Because I’m actually much more effective at sales prospecting via email campaigns, I decided to avoid the chaos of the Dreamforce pavilion completely. This is how I know Leadspace is 100% lying.

My next question is: how did they get my email?

I’m guessing that they probably bought it from someone or got it from another sponsor that they have a partnership with. They probably traded leads or purchased them, but it looks like they didn’t do a very good job collecting the correct source of their leads, and they didn’t segment their lists properly either.

This might not be Leadspace’s fault, but lying about how they met me at a booth is their fault, and there’s no excuse for it.

Likewise, their email is boring and self-focused. It just talks all about themselves, using jargon like, “predictive platform” and “targeted lead discovery.” On top of that, they make fluffy claims like that they’re a “world-class demand gen operation,” without much substance to back up their claims, leaving them feeling hollow. Instead of taking the time to convince me of their value, they presumably “shove the meat” (if there is any) into a link to some video, which I did not click on, because I was already irritated and bored.

Finally, they finish it off with a lame and generic call to action that has no benefit for me whatsoever. It’s vague and simply not compelling enough for me to respond.

What a better sales prospecting tactic would have been:

First of all, let’s address their obvious lie.

Yes, I went to Dreamforce, but no I didn’t meet them. Regardless of how they procured my contact information, they could have used so many other tactics that would have left them in the clear.

For example, they could have just said something more neutral like:

“Hey Heather,

I saw that you also attended Dreamforce, but it looks like we didn’t have a chance to meet.

I was hoping to talk to you about [xyz benefit/issue] because [abc reason].

[Insert relevant social proof that demonstrates their value and ability to solve said problem.]

Do you have 15 minutes to [insert some kind of incentive to make me want to talk to you]?

Thanks,”

Likewise, if they had done a little bit of research, they would have known that I also gave a talk at Dreamforce. They could have mentioned that and asked me a thoughtful question, or simply asked me how they could catch a recording of that talk.

Another option would have been to talk about a specific aspect of the conference that they liked or enjoyed, whether it was a talk or party, in an attempt to humanize themselves to me. This could have been used as a conversation starter that would have felt much more authentic and genuine. The email could still be just as mass and equally not personalized, but it wouldn’t have been irritating and boring.

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Have crappy cold emails in your inbox from Dreamforce that you want me to tear apart? Send them my way at shame (at) salesfolk.com! (Feel free to share you thoughts and feelings, or nominate them for an “award.”)

For more tips on improving your cold emails, check out our cold email mastery course. (Lesson 1 is free, and full of some of our “winning email templates.”)

Why Domo’s Cold Emails Are Ugly and Spammy

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Domo is known for their great business intelligence technology, but apparently, some of their cold emails aren’t so great.

I received this strange and lazy cold email from them a few months ago. It immediately caught my attention because it’s unusually bad, but it contains many of the cardinal sins I see other B2B sales teams making.

Let’s take a look at what’s wrong with it:

domo spam email part 1

domo spam email part 2

Wow! …talk about overwhelming!

This ugly cold email is an attempt at an extremely strange and confusing breakup email.  As you can see, it wasn’t even possible to fit this bad cold email’s screenshot into a single image, which gives you a sense of how hard it was to read on mobile.

Through this ginormous photo affixed inside their email, Domo attacks my eyes with every available feature they’ve got, without any attempt to give context as to who they are, what they’re talking about, or what they want.

What’s even stranger is that this email starts with the sender mentioning he’s previously reached out to me before, but this is the first and only email I ever got from him.

He’s using a lazy tactic and I’m calling “BS.”

Who would want to respond to a salesperson who’s taking such a thoughtless and self-focused approach?

Why this email made it to the front of our queue for “The Hall of Shame:”

  • The image is HUGE, giving it an especially spammy image/text ratio, dramatically increasing its chances it will wind up in spam
  • It’s super challenging to read, physically and mentally–with how busy the image and text is, there’s no way anyone could quickly glance and know what the heck is going on, or what the call to action is
  • If the image doesn’t render properly, most of the email’s information would be lost
  • I’ve caught the sender in a lie–they’ve never contacted or interacted with the recipient before

don't be spammy like domo

How to Fix This Bad Cold Email:

This strange attempt at a breakup email could be a lot better if they took out the eyesore of an image and replaced it with a link to a valuable resource (actionable content that’s less promotional). This would make it much easier for the reader to understand what the salesperson’s goal is, giving them much better chances of actually getting a response.

However, that would be my advice for a breakup email, but this email was actually the first email that this sales guy at Domo sent me, unless all the ones before this just caught in spam.

Have bad cold emails in your inbox? Send them to us!

Help us fight the thoughtless spammers, one crappy cold email at a time by sending us the worst cold emails you’ve ever received.

We’ll put them up anonymously on the “Hall of Shame,” and shoot you an email when they go live.

Please send all submissions to “[email protected].”

(And feel free to suggest what you want to “nominate” the bad cold email for!)

Why Presumptuous Emails Are Complete Turn-Offs

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Hall of Shame Award: The Cold-Email Dictator

presumptuous cold email

Why This Cold Email Won The Hall of Shame:

Talk about forceful! This email is the definition of a turn-off— who wants to be vaguely coerced into an interview without any details of the product?

It begins with a promise, a classic promise that this email will truly be the last email. That’s BS. Rambling on, it assumes a condescending approach coupled with strange formatting and the “heart stopping” dot dot dots- as if the reader and sender had been meddling over a deal for quite some time.

Aggressive much?

Although the sender guarantees a seemingly swift process (the reader simply responds with a specific date/time), it is clear that the reader is dealing with a stranger.

Who would want to follow up and trust someone who a stranger who has provided no social proof or value that is presumptuously dictating an exact interview time after we already haven’t responded to their previous emails?

Stop shoving words down the reader’s throat: Give the reader some breathing room.

Why this email fails and got on “The Hall of Shame”:

· From the start, the tone is obnoxious, “turning off” the reader
· Gives a regurgitated way to respond, as if the reader was interested in responding in the first place
· No detail or reminder about the sender’s product/service and the benefits their business offers

Blog1 Silly Image

How to Fix This Cold Email:

The hook is everything, and this one suffered miserably. Instead, focus on an opening that targets the reader’s desires (perhaps a catchy sentence or an intriguing question).

Scratch the whole “I’ll do all the work, you sit back and relax” approach. Instead, invite the reader into a rapport that would eventually lead into scheduling an interview, rather than arranging one right off the bat.

Have bad cold emails in your inbox? Send them to us!
Help us fight the thoughtless spammers, one crappy cold email at a time by sending us the worst cold emails you’ve ever received.

We’ll put them up anonymously on the “Hall of Shame,” and shoot you an email when they go live.

Please send all submissions to “[email protected].”

(And feel free to suggest what you want to nominate the “bad cold email for!”)

This Ironic Email Demonstrates the Dangers of Not Researching

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Are you skipping your product research?

Hall of Shame Award: The Ironic Email that Lacks Research

This crappy cold email is amazingly ironic — it’s from a B2B lead generation company that is trying to convey how they can “Identify and hand pick highly targeted leads that match your idea customer bio,” and yet it is reaching out to Salesfolk (we write cold emails as an alternative to working with outsourced lead gen companies in case you didn’t know) as a potential client.  

Talk about a lack of research?

They definitely didn’t “hand pick” their potential target list, and Salesfolk definitely doesn’t match their ideal customer profile.  The only truth to their pitch is how they “automate email outreach,”  which they are definitely doing at scale.

Why this email fails and got on “The Hall of Shame”:

  • Lacks research for the prospect (we’re the wrong target for their product/service)
  • Lacks a  strong value proposition, and instead relies on a very lazy list of “features”
  • Also needs a captivating hook to catch my attention and stand out from the noise

Are you skipping your product research?

How to Fix This Bad Cold Email:

The best fix for this email would be to go back to the drawing board and look carefully at their own prospecting list. They should plan their list more carefully and ask themselves questions such as “Who are we contacting and how does this product add value to them?”  

A highly targeted list is far better than blasting out mass emails to people who have no benefit from your product, who will only mark you as spam (or put you on our “Hall of Shame”).  This kind of “mass-blasting” will only result in low response rates, and even worse, can damage your company’s name or IP’s reputation.

So please, research your prospects when sending cold emails!

Have bad cold emails in your inbox? Send them to us!

Help us fight the thoughtless spammers, one crappy cold email at a time by sending us the worst cold emails you’ve ever received.

We’ll put them up anonymously on the “Hall of Shame,” and shoot you an email when they go live.

Please send all submissions to “[email protected].”
(And feel free to suggest what you want to nominate the “bad cold email for!”)

Why Selfish Emails Never Work

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Hall of Shame Award: The Selfish Email That Lacks a Value Proposition

Why Self Centered Emails Dont Work

Above we have an email that is truly self-absorbed — it completely fails to captivate the interest of the reader, and instead focuses its message on finding someone to sell the product to with the classic “who’s the right person” approach.

The problem with that approach is that it’s not the 90’s anymore, and so when you attempt this method, people usually just think you’re lazy and just sending untargeted “mass-blasts.”

At the bare minimum, you at least need to tailor your cold emails to a specific buyer persona. Adding additional personalization beyond that will usually increase your odds of getting a response even more.

But no matter how personalized your cold emails are, they still won’t work if there’s no benefit or reason for the reader to respond.

The above email asks for a meeting, either with the reader or another associate of the company, three times, without ever taking into account the needs or priorities of the reader even once.  The sender fails to address “What’s in it for the recipient”, and instead focuses only on  “What’s in it for me.”

Why this email fails and got on “The Hall of Shame”:

  • Pretty self-centered
  • Not personable or tailored to buyer persona (even admits to “taking a stab in the dark here,” wow!)
  • A lot of features, but no strong benefits for the reader
  • Bullet points! These make the email feel like mass marketing instead of a conversation. (Bullet points always perform worse on cold emails!)
  • This email is all over the place, with no focus on a single benefit or idea.

Why Self-Centered Emails Don't Work

How to Fix This Bad Cold Email:

Start by scrapping the vague, impersonal opener. Instead, start with a captivating sentence or thoughtful question that is targeted to the reader’s needs or pain points.  

Adding more personalization would also go a long ways too. This doesn’t necessarily mean having a lot of different “custom inserts” for every prospect, but at least they could try to focus their message on the prospect more instead of being all about “Koalified Leads.”

This email also needs to focus on one clear benefit so it can be more compelling and effective.  

Have bad cold emails in your inbox? Send them to us!

Help us fight the thoughtless spammers, one crappy cold email at a time by sending us the worst cold emails you’ve ever received.

We’ll put them up anonymously on the “Hall of Shame,” and shoot you an email when they go live.

Please send all submissions to “[email protected].”

(And feel free to suggest what you want to nominate the “bad cold email for!”)

Be a goat, not a sheep!

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